Schrier reached me. (see https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abigail_Shrier) She put into writing some feelings I’ve had bouncing around. The article’s a good read in any case.
If she’s right and I think she is, then we have a developing problem of there being a whole mechanism that puts our children in harms way. I’ve scoffed at accusations by right wing pundits and in the past I’ve declared many of the accusations false. Now I really wonder if anyone has a clear picture or an unbiased viewpoint. For example, looking at the Williams Institute, which I would call a LGBT friendly audience, the current figures show numbers in the percent range (o.5 .. 0) for people who are trans.
Just a few decades ago the statistics showed a much smaller population, something like a .1% rate or even much lower.
Here are the things I believe we should encourage. For children showing no particular signs of interest in activities, clothing or other gender aligned interests, we should not bring the subject up. If the child brings the subject up because they’re having these feelings then we should engage them but at a young age I think it’s the same as with anything overly sexual. Kids younger than six or so generally are going to be satisfied with simple answers.
I personally don’t think we should be discouraging but I do think that distracting your kids away from sexuality as a heavily explored topic before the’re closer to puberty is a good idea. On the other hand I don’t believe in lying to kids ever.
If you do have a trans child then what I’ve read of experiences and more modern experiences leads me to suggest caution. But it’s important to discuss keeping things confidential to avoid conflicts with other kids and adults. We’ve certainly made great progress, but there are also places that are much less than friendly. Personally a great time for me would have been when I was in college. It naturally presents an opportunity to make a new set of friends without the student’s trans nature being a big deal.
For a kid who’s heading down a path to a medical transition I don’t think the puberty blockers are worth the risk. I and many others in their 40’s. 5o’s and later can often have very nice cosmetic results even without the blockers. Also, just the fact that they will only have a few years of natal sex hormones will mean much less hair growth in transgirls and much less bone structure changes for trans boys.
A last piece of advice for the young transgender population and the all too often tendency of teens and younger tweens to take a kind of holier than thou attitude. My advice, presuming you are passable is to use regular pronouns. My suggestion for leading a stress free life.
My Gifted Life 