I know I’ve written a few times about depression and my battle with it. I’m running through another tough spot where I can’t get comfortable for much of the day. I’m trying to distract myself as much as possible. I’m getting some relief from cannabis and the odd hit of scotch but there’s a limit…… Continue reading A Tough few days
A Scary Moment
People used to tell me how brave I was for transitioning. I’d poo poo that but there was some truth to it, especially viewing it in retrospect. Transitioning is not for the faint of heart – think carefully if you are contemplating it. One of the most scary moments of my life was the morning…… Continue reading A Scary Moment
Anxiety
Closely related to depression. I’ve had a not so fun few days with a great deal of anxiety. I have a theory that it’s due to my not keeping a good schedule on my meds. We’ll see. Generally, in the greater time scale I’m doing pretty well. My problems are ordinary and don’t depress me,…… Continue reading Anxiety
Growing Weed
I’ve taken to using medical marijuana to help with Parkinson’s, depression and anything else that might get caught up and helped. Unfortunately it isn’t exactly covered by insurance. Here in Mass it’s legal for both recreational and medical use though and I’m able to grow my own. I’ve always been an avid DIY sort and…… Continue reading Growing Weed
On Depression
I’ve mentioned, at least in passing that I suffer from depression. Depression has been a constant companion of sorts as I’ve traversed my journey. Of course it was probably there from the start and barring some amazing advance in the healing arts at the end too. Some years ago my therapist suggested pushing back on…… Continue reading On Depression
Wrapping our lives with meaning
Ah, I struggle with this. I fear to be lying in a bed with a morphine drip waiting to pass, and thinking of what might have been. I write this having already worked a career—you’d think that would be enough. But it isn’t enough because there are ( I hope ) some good years left…… Continue reading Wrapping our lives with meaning
The Final Day
It was a sunny day in AugustA call arrived to say my dad didn’t have much time left but not to hurryI dawdled a little because of this and so when I arrived his breathing had already ended A sat with him in his quiet room. His for the last six weeks counting down the…… Continue reading The Final Day
What now?
You’ve struggled. Coming out to friends and family, counting losses, having problems on the job. The world has changed around you. Perhaps you have a different job. Perhaps there’s a new search for new friends having lost the old ones not only due to transphobia but because those guys can’t related to a woman. This…… Continue reading What now?
Do you need to be gender dysphoric
I’m not a static person and don’t have static views. Every time I read a post from someone it has the potential to evolve my own views. I only consider myself an expert in my own personal experiences, not other’s. When people have asked me if gender dysphoria is an essential part of being trans…… Continue reading Do you need to be gender dysphoric
Straight
It seems so prosaic, and ironic. First I thought I was perhaps bi, but with little actual evidence but having a couple of sexual encounters with women post transition. It started in 2012. We were watching the Victoria’s secret show of pretty underwear. I suddenly realized I didn’t care about the scantily clad models. At…… Continue reading Straight
My Gifted Life 